Ever since embryo adoption became a forerunner on our list of how-to-deal-with-this-damned-infertility, I've been scouring the web for more information. And what I've found is...a lot of Christians. Now, I've been asked, "what did you get for Christmas?", enough times to know that I'm generally surrounded by Christians. And they're generally nice. But I was (naively?) surprised to find that embryo adoption was such a Christian crusade.
There seem to be plenty of embryo adoption agencies out there, run by folks who favor bible quotes as Web site headers. From what I can tell, they work something like live-baby-adoption-agencies. There are lawyers. You pay (significant) fees. And there is some sort of meet and greet process in which embryo makers select their chosen embryo seekers. There is definitely a preferred "profile" and "single" women are not exactly welcome.
It also appears that most IVF clinics have an internal embryo adoption program. Patients in a specific office can donate embryos that are then offered to other paitents in the same office who have been waiting on an embryo adoption list. It's more of an egalitarian affair. Embryo makers and seekers never meet or exchange emails and embryos are offered up on a first-come-first-served basis.
But what about the rest of us? The liberals, the lesbians, the jews, the hippies. Those that don't fit the profile at the standard embryo adoption agencies and don't want to play baby grab bag at the IVF clinic. Shouldn't we have a forum to exchange embryos*? To match the makers and the seekers? Where is LMatch (and for that matter, what is LMatch - LesbianMatch? LiberalMatch?)?
I've seen the generosity of bloggers, sharing meds and advice. What if some bloggers want to share their embryos? I propose we open up our blogs, and for those so inclined, offer up our frozen embryos**. I'll even offer bakeonebuyone as a new-age yenta of sorts***. Makers, seekers, tell me a little bit about yourselves, and let's see if we can't knock this infertility bitch on her ass.****
*It is 100% illegal to sell embryos.
**If you missed the previous disclaimer, it is 100% illegal to sell embryos.
***And again I say, it is 100% illegal to sell embroys.
****Um, we might need a lawyer for this. But it's worth a try, no?
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I've been thinking a lot about this, actually. I've jumped ahead to wonder what we'll do if we have any embryos left over after we do IVF (and get pregnant with twins! Positive thinking.) I'm having so many complicated thoughts about it that I never thought I'd have. But I love the idea of opening up the discussion at least.
ReplyDeleteI've been thinking about donating embryos too.... I feel like it is only right, since a donation from a generous person is helping us reach our dream of parenthood, pay it forward and all that jazz.... in fact, I am half-way considering becoming a surrogate for a gay or lesbian couple, and once I am done making babies, I think I will give away a kidney.
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