Right out the window.
Seems I have a torn plantaris muscle. Also known as "tennis leg". Even though I don't play tennis. The plantaris is a "vestigial muscle" that up to 20% of people don't even have. Consider it the tonsils of the leg! Two things I've learned: 1) it sure is a bummer to get old and 2) sometimes things you don't even need are a pain in the ass (erm, leg).
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